Dear Kim Q&A Column Archive

DINING WITH DONORS

Dear Kim:

If you're having lunch with a major donor and the donor orders first and gets the beet salad and squash soup, and you're dying to try the pub burger with the pastrami, basil and aioli, should you forego your carnivorous desires in order to match the donor's obvious vegetarian tendencies?

-Gnawing on what to gnaw on

Dear Gnawing:

When eating with a major donor, (or, in fact, anyone you don’t know very well) your problem is not what to order, but how to have an interesting conversation. This means you cannot focus on food at all. Generally, when I am going to meet a donor for a meal, I eat a little something beforehand. Then whatever I order, I can eat in small bites while focusing my attention on the donor. When eating with donors, you also want to think about how you look when eating certain foods. For example, pasta—my personal favorite food of all time—is not easy to eat daintily. French onion soup or pizza with long stringy cheese is not good. Anything that can get stuck in your teeth—poppy seeds, spinach, fresh ground pepper—is not good. You assume your donor is a vegetarian, which he or she may be, but this person could also be on a diet, or just trying to spare you the sight of eating a messy hamburger. During your lunch with the donor, focus on the donor. Take a friend out to dinner and focus on the burger.

Good luck!

-Kim Klein