Dear Kim Q&A Column Archive
April 2007
TOO-GOOD-TO-BE-TRUE GIFTS
Dear Kim:
The staff of my small organization did cartwheels when we received
a phone call from Mr. Hedge-fund-manager’s secretary announcing
that she was sending his $30,000 donation, to be kept anonymous.
Our financial forecast for the fiscal year was promptly updated;
new program spending decisions were made. Imagine our dismay
when we got a call three weeks later saying, “Oops. We
meant to give that check to another organization. Have you cashed
it yet?”
What’s the protocol (and etiquette) for something like
this? We figure we’ll try to convince him that our work
is worthy, but of course we’ll have to give it back if
he urges us to do so. Is it appropriate to inform him that now
we’ll have to snatch food out of the mouths of children
in order to give it back? And that this is really demoralizing
for staff?
Sincerely,
Canceling the Cartwheels
Dear Cancelled Cartwheel:
What a terrible story! I don’t know what you are obligated
to do legally, and I would find out. I also think there is something
very fishy about this story (perhaps I am suspicious of hedge
funds). Why would a person in the investment business give a
donation by check instead of the much more tax advantaged appreciated
stock? How would someone writing a check for that amount of money
confuse you with another charity and not notice for three weeks?
How does this person expect you to maintain his anonymity when
you are so mad at him?
To say nothing of the sheer crass insensitivity of calling and
just asking for it back with no words like, “I’d
like to give something to help out. I can imagine this was a
blow. I am so terribly embarrassed….”
But don’t stoop to begging for the money. You don’t
want money from someone who doesn’t want you to have it.
This gift would not be renewed in any case. This is a chance
to go to a few of your closest donors, tell them what happened
and tell them you don’t want to have to cancel the new
programs you were starting with this money. Raise it from people
who like you, who are way more likely to give again. Count your
blessings that it wasn’t a bigger gift.
The overall lesson here is that things that seem too good to
be true usually are.
--Kim Klein
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